Parents

Parent’s Rights in Islam

Bismilahirahmanirrahim was salatu was salamu ala ashraf il mursleem sayidna muhameden wa ala alehe wa ashabehe aj maeen

Asalamualakum, brothers and sisters, my name is sarah Elgohary, and today I will be telling you about parent’s rights in Islam. Islam recognizes family as a basic social unit. Along with the husband-wife relationship the Parent-child relationship is the most important one. To maintain any social relationship both parties must have some clear-cut Rights as well as obligations. Duties of one side are the Rights of the other side. So in Parent-child relationship the Rights of parents are the obligations (duties) of the children, the Rights of children are obligations (duties) of parents. Islam clearly defines the Rights of Parents (which mean duties of children) and obligations of parents (which means Rights of children).It is clear that after Allah parents are the people who give us innumerable favors. They provide protection, food and clothing to the newly born. The mother sacrifices her comforts and sleep to provide comfort to her children. The father works hard to provide for their physical, educational and psychological (and spiritual) needs. It is a matter of common courtesy that if a person does you some favor you feel obliged to them. Verbally you say ‘thank you’ to them. You try to repay them for his gifts and favors. So it is with Allah and with parents. Allah’s favors cannot be counted or repaid except by thanking Him and obeying His orders. After Allah our parents deserve our thanks and obedience for the favors they had done to us.

“And your Lord has ordained that you shall worship none save Him and shall do your parents a good turn.” (Surah Al Isra’)

It means obeying and respecting them, speaking softly and kindly, avoiding harsh words or harsh tone, giving them company when they are lonely, caring for their physical and psychological needs (especially in their old age), and praying to Allah that He may bless them and have mercy on them.

The only thing above respect to Mother, is the worship of Allah (SWT) – It is mentioned in surah.17, Verse No.28-29, also it says that:

“Allah has ordained for you, that you worship none but Him, and to be kind to our parents And if any one or both of them reach old age do not say a word of bad to them but address them with honor, and speak to them with kindness, and pray to Allah (SWT).

A similar thing is repeated again in Surah Ahqaf, Ch.46, Verse No.15: “We have enjoined on the human beings to be kind to his parents. In pain did their mother bore them and in pain did she give them birth.”

According to a Hadith related in ‘Ahmed’, as well as in ‘Ibn-e-Majah’ – It says ‘Paradise lies at the feet of the mother’.

That does not mean that if my mother is walking on the road and if she steps on muck and filth – that thing becomes Paradise. It means that after you fulfill your basic duties, if you respect your mother, if you are kind to your mother, If you are honorable to your mother, you will Inshaallah enter Paradise.

Another Hadith related in Sahih Bukhari in Volume 8, Ch. No. 2 Hadith No. 2, as well as in Sahih-Muslim – “It says that a man asked the Prophet: ‘Who requires the maximum love and respect and my companionship in this world? The Prophet replied – ‘your mother’. ‘Who is next’? – ‘your mother’. ‘Who is next?’ – ‘your mother’. The man asked for the fourth time, – ‘Who is next’. The Prophet replied ‘your father’.”  

As to the reward for doing good to our parents a Hadith mentions the following story: “Three people of ancient days were once travelling in a mountainous region. The rain, thunder and lightning made them go inside a cave. A mudslide made a stone block the opening to the cave. The people were entrapped inside. When the storm stopped they tried to push back the heavy stone to get out of the cave but they could not. They wondered ‘what to do now’. At last seeing that their joint efforts also cannot move the stone they decided to pray to Allah sincerely. One of them suggested, ‘each one of us should say one good thing he has done in his life and beg Allah to move the stone. One said, “One night my old mother asked me to bring a cup of milk for her. During the time I milked the goat and brought it to her she had gone to sleep. I did not think it proper to disturb her. So I stood by her bedside for the whole night till she got up in the morning and then I offered her the cup of milk. O allah, if this act of mine was approved by you please shift this stone.” The stone slipped a little but not enough to let them get out. Similarly, the second and the third man mentioned an act of goodness and prayed to allah to shift  the stone. The stone slipped down and the entry to the cave opened up. So the men got out.” This story shows how service to one’s parents leads to blessings from Allah that can you rescue from troubles.

The right of parents upon you is to do good with them. You should be good to them physically as well as mentally and also with your words and your actions. You should be obedient to them unless in it there is disobedience to your Lord or there is some harm to you. Be kindhearted to them and serve them as they need your help. In their old age, in case of any help or weakness, neither speak to them harshly, because one day you will also become as old as they are. You will be a father or mother as they are your parents and, if life permits, soon you will be an old man before your children just like your parents became old before you. So you need the help of your children as your parents need you today. If you are doing good to your parents then you must have the good news of a great reward and a better showing from your children, because whoever remained good to his parents, his children will also be good to him; and whoever annoyed his parents, will also be annoyed by his children. It is like what goes around comes around. 

    Dasakallah brothers and sisters for listening to my speech about parents rights in islam and inshaallah remember to say this short du’a “rabil hamhuma kama rabeany saghra” it means my rabb have mercy on those who have brought me up in my childhood. asalamualakum